Kristi and Sean are one of the first formal wedding couples I married. They make my job more fun and interesting then I ever thought it could be. Sean was a confirmed bachelor. He swore that if he ever got married he would never do it during football or basketball season. He also insisted the ceremony be no longer then 7 minutes. Kristi showed up to the meeting with a big wedding binder and just smiled politely as he made this announcement. She wanted a wedding! And, well, Sean really loves Kristi, so they compromised. They got married where he golfs - The Broadmoor Country Club in Indianapolis. They had a fantastic cocktail party reception instead of a sit down dinner. We considered everything we could to to make their wedding ceremony perfect. We needed to mix a little religion, a lot of romance, and a little fun too. I explained that you could have a slightly longer and fun ceremony and he agreed to be open to it.
One of the most interesting things about Sean and Kristi is their love for sports and their dedication to their Alma mater's. Kristi's family is die hard Notre Dame and Sean graduated from Purdue. Their competitive nature and sports rivalry is a big part of their life. We ended up adding fun vows that included sports and they toasted from mugs from each other's schools. In then end, Sean couldn't have been happier!!
May the creator of Love itself be here today and with us always. Amen.
Words about Love and Marriage
On Your Wedding Day
Today is a day you will always remember, the greatest in anyone's life. You'll start the day just two people in love, and end it as Husband and Wife. It's a brand new beginning the start of a journey, with moments to cherish and treasure, and although there'll be times when you both disagree, these will surely be outweighed by pleasure. You'll have heard many words of advice in the past, when the secrets of marriage were spoken,
but you know that the answers lie hidden inside, where the bond of true love lies unbroken. So live Happy 'forever as lovers and friends, It's the dawn of a new life for you. As you stand there together with love in your eyes, from the moment you whisper "I Do.".and with luck, all your hopes, and your dreams can be real. May success find its way to your hearts. Tomorrow can bring you the greatest of joys. But today is the day it all starts.
Recognition of Parents
Before we go on to say more about love, it is important to recognize from where love comes in our lives. Of course, someone first loved Kristi and Sean. Someone cared for them as children, showed them what love, compassion, kindness, and care is. Of course we are speaking of the parents. The work of our parents is critical in preparing us to be the loving adults we are, so today, Kristi and Sean want to make special recognition of their parents for making today possible. I speak for everyone here when we say “Thank You mom’s and dad’s for beginning in Kristi and Sean’s something so special.
(Now Kristi and Sean present flowers to their parents - mom gets flower, dad gets hug.)
Welcome friends and family of Kristi and Sean. Thank you for joining us this evening as we celebrate their love and joining together in marriage.
The Art of a Good Marriage
by Wilfered Arlan Peterson
A good marriage must be created.
In marriage the "little" things are the big things.
It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say, ”I love you" at least once a day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is having a mutual sense of values, and common objectives.
It is standing together and facing the world.
It is forming a circle that gathers in the whole family.
It is speaking words of appreciation, and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
It is not only marrying the right person -- it is being the right partner.
A passage from writer Gerald May
There is a desire within each of us, in the deep center of ourselves that we call our heart. We were born with it, it is never completely satisfied, and it never dies. We are often unaware of it, but it is always awake. It is the human desire for love. Every person in this earth yearns to love, to be loved, to know love. Our true identity, our reason for being, is to be found in this desire…
Love is the ‘why’ of life: why we are functioning at all, what we want to be efficient for… I am convinced it is the fundamental energy of the human spirit, the fuel on which we run, the wellspring of our vitality. And grace, which is the flowing, creative activity of love itself, is what makes all goodness possible.
Love should come first; it should be the beginning of and the reason for everything.
Kristi and Sean, this celebration is the outward token of your sacred and inward union of hearts, which the church and temple may bless, and the state make legal, but which neither state nor church can create nor annul. It is a union created by your loving purpose and kept by your abiding will. It is in this spirit and for this purpose that you have come here to be joined together.
Do you, Kristi, choose Sean as your husband, joining with him today in spirit, offering your friendship and loving care? Will you be kind, patient, honest, forgiving and keep a sense of humor? Do you promise to honor his growth and freedom as well as your own, to cherish and respect him, share in his dreams and support him, love and protect him in times of challenge as well as times of joy?
(Kristi: “I do”)
Do you, Sean, choose Kristi as your wife, joining with her today in spirit, offering your friendship and loving care? Will you be kind, patient, honest, forgiving and keep a sense of humor? Do you promise to honor her growth and freedom as well as your own, to cherish and respect her, share in her dreams and support her, love and protect her in times of challenge as well as times of joy?
(Sean: “I do”)
Meaning of the Rings
As you exchange rings, may you remember that from this day forward you shall not walk alone. May your hearts provide shelter, and in each others’ arms may you find your home.
I, (Kristi), give you this ring as a promise and symbol of my heart, my faithfulness and my commitment to you. When I’m angry, I’ll seek to be kind. When we speak, I will be truthful. I will listen and I will be respectful. And each day of my life, I promise to love and cherish you.
I, (Sean), give you this ring as a promise and symbol of my heart, my faithfulness and my commitment to you. When I’m angry, I’ll seek to be kind. When we speak, I will be truthful. I will listen and I will be respectful. And each day of my life, I promise to love and cherish you.
Extra Vows and Unity Ceremony
[Kristi and Sean pick up the ND and Purdue cups]
Sean, do you promise to:
Let Kristi organize and re-organize the house as she sees fit
Make all the household decorating decisions
Listen to most of the details of most of her stories,
and cheer for Notre Dame at every game (except when they are playing Purdue)?
Sean: “I do”
Kristi, do you promise to let Sean:
Let Sean record every sporting event he attends and watch it over again when he gets home
Make all the household technology decisions
Listen to most of the details of most of his golf games,
and cheer for Purdue at every game (except when they are playing ND)?
Kristi: “I do”
[K&S exchange cups, clink them and take a drink. Victoria sets them off to side - out of picture]
Kristi and Sean join hands
Life and love are the greatest gifts bestowed upon humanity.
May your union grant you patience, tolerance, and understanding
as well as the passion and excitement every marriage should possess.
May you need one another, but not out of weakness.
May you want one another, but not out of lack.
May you support one another, as a sign of mutual independence.
May you continually rediscover your love in one another, as the greatest gift of all.
May God be with you and bless you;
May you see your children's children.
May you be poor in misfortune,
Rich in blessings,
May you know nothing but happiness
From this day forward.
May the road rise to meet you
May the wind be always at your back
May the warm rays of sun fall upon your home
And may the hand of a friend always be near.
May green be the grass you walk on,
May blue be the skies above you,
May pure be the joys that surround you,
May true be the hearts that love you.
I now pronounce you husband and wife.
You may kiss the bride!!
Ladies and Gentleman:
Mr. and Mrs. Sean and Kristi ...!
I am open to marrying any couple. It is my goal to meet each couple where they are and help them to have a positive wedding experience. In order to meet you where you are, I approach every wedding with an open mind - I don’t know anything about you until you tell me and that’s only if you choose to tell me. Wedding ceremony scripts have been written for years for brides and grooms. Now, bride and bride or groom and groom are very common. Some couples are choosing to forego traditional gender roles altogether and are using the terms spouse or partner. If you have made the choice to use non-traditional pronouns, please let me know and I am happy to honor your preferences. Any wedding ceremony script can be changed to reflect your personal preferences.
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