The Declaration of Intent - Secular, Non-Religious "I Do's!" xo

I Do!

​The "I Do's!" 
The only thing I really have to do when I marry a couple is as for their verbal consent to the marriage. 

"Do you?" "I Do!"  "Do you?"  "I Do!"  "We're done!"  Or, I now pronounce you married! 

Many think of these as wedding vows, and they are.  Some couples think of weddings vows as something you write yourself, your thoughts and feelings about each other.   We often use these options as the declaration of intent, followed by your own vows, or just use these options and they very easily serve as both the Declaration of Intent, and the vows.  

A lot of couples may use these as prompts for writing their own vows - because sometimes you need a little help to get your own feelings to flow!

Declaration of Intent 1

Dear friends, marriage is a legal relationship which is one of the foundations of community and society. It is, therefore, a public and civil relationship which expects all other people to honor and respect it. Marriage is also a spiritual relationship – a covenant of heart and soul, and a shelter for love and intimacy.  Marriage is not to be entered into lightly, but is to be understood by all as a lifelong connection of two lives, two hearts, two fortunes and two futures. Marriage involves both privileges and obligations. Because of this, I ask you:

Do each of you enter this union freely and without coercion?   We do

Are you prepared to accept both the rights and responsibilities of married life?  We are

Is it your intention to support, honor, defend and uphold one another in all circumstances?   Yes

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Declaration of Intent 2

Name, from this day onward, do you choose Name to be your wife/husband/partner in life, your best friend and your only love? To live together, play together and laugh together; To work by his/her/their side and dream in his/her/their arms; To fill her heart and feed his/her/their soul; To always seek out the best in her/him/them; Always loving her/him/them with all your heart, until the end of your forever?
If so, please say, “I do!”

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Declaration of Intent 3

Name and Name, of all the people you know, you have chosen one another as life partners. Are you ready to be married? If so, say, “we are.”

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Declaration of Intent 4

Name, will you love Name when you are together and when you are apart; when life is peaceful and when it is disordered; when you are proud of her/him/them and when you are disappointed in her/him/them; in times of leisure and in times of work; will you honor her/his/their goals and dreams and help her/him/them fulfill them? If so, say, “I will.”​

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Declaration of Intent 5

​Name and Name, as you come this day to affirm your love and commitment, may you always remember to value each other as special and unique individuals, and that you respect each other’s thoughts, ideas, and feelings. May you be able to forgive and to forget when wronged and live each day that you may share it together – as from this day forward you will be each other's’ home, comfort and sanctuary.

Name, will you embrace/take Name as your wife/husband/spouse; As your companion and best friend for life? Will you treat her/him/them with love and devotion, honor and respect? Will you stand by her/him/them in the triumphs and tragedies of life, as a faithful and caring wife/husband/spouse?
​If so, say, “I will.”

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Declaration of Intent 6

Will you, Name, have Name, from this day forward, to be your wedded wife/husband/spouse, in times of celebration, in times of sadness, in times of pleasure and in times of pain, in times of sickness and times of health? If so, please say, “I will.”

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Declaration of Intent 7

​Name, do you take Name, for your lawfully wedded wife/husband/spouse, to love and cherish from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health?
If so, please say, “I do.”

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Declaration of Intent 8

Name, will you take Name, to be your wedded wife/husband/spouse, to love, to cherish, to continually bestow upon her/him/them your heart’s deepest devotion?
​If so, please say, “I will.”

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Declaration of Intent 9

Name, will you have this man/woman to be your wife/husband/spouse, to live together in the covenant of marriage? Do you promise to love her/him/them, comfort her/him/them, honor and keep her/him/them, in sickness and in health; forsaking all others, be faithful to her/him/them as long as you both shall live?
If so, please say, “I do.”

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Declaration of Intent 10

Will you Name, have this man/woman from this day forward to be your wedded wife/husband/spouse, to live together in love in the sacred state of matrimony? Do you promise to love her/him/them, comfort  her/him/them, honor and cherish  her/him/them, in sickness and health, in trying times and smooth, in lean times and full, all the days of your lives?
If so, please say, “I do.”

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Declaration of Intent 11

Name and Name, If you are ready to step into the estate of matrimony, assuming all its rights, obligations and abundant joys, please indicate by joining hands.

Do you, Name take Name as your husband/wife, to love him/her/them and to honor him/her/them, to nurture, serve and support him/her/them, in times of joy and in times of difficulty? Do you promise to remain by him/her/them side regardless of what trouble befalls you, and in the presence of temptation to forsake this love, do you promise to remain steadfast and true? Do you promise with all your heart and soul to honor this vow till death do you part?
If so, please say, “I do.”

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Declaration of Intent 12

Name, do you take Name whom you now hold by the Hand to be your lawful wedded wife/husband/spouse?
Name:  I Do

Do you promise to love and cherish her/him/them, in sickness and in health, for richer for poorer, for better for worse, and forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto her/him/them, for so long as you both shall live?
Name:  I Do
​
(repeat)

Do you mutually promise you will love, cherish and respect one another throughout the years?
Name and Name:   We do

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Declaration of Intent 13

​Having acknowledged the deep value of marriage, and recognizing marriage as the convergence of your individual and joint destinies as well as the greatest support for them, do you both choose to marry, to speak the words that will bind you as husband and wife, allowing you to become most fully yourself in each other’s presence for the rest of your days?

Name and Name:   We do

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Declaration of Intent 14

Name, do you here in the presence of family and friends, declare your love for and commitment to Name, choosing her/him/them as your life partner and soulmate?  Do you freely offer yourself to her and willingly accept the gift of self she offers to you?

If so, Please say, "I do."

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Declaration of Intent 15

Name, do you come here today, in the presence of these witnesses, with love in your heart and with a conscious desire to be united in marriage with Name?  Do you promise to share the responsibility for growth and enrichment of your lives together and to give to Name all the loving support she/he/they needs to become the person she/he/they is destined to be?

If so, Please say, "I do."

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Declaration of Intent 16

This new journey will be at times richly rewarding and extremely difficult, but, most importantly, it will be a journey you take together. Marriage is much more than your signatures on a legal contract. You are promising and have asked all of these people you love to watch you make this promise, that you want to be with each other and only each other for the rest of your lives, and that you will do everything in your power to honor the promises you are making here today. For their part, the people who love you will also do everything in their power to try to help you hold up your end of the bargain, too.

Name, do you take Name to be your wife/husband/spouse, promising to love her/him/them, comfort, honor, respect, and care for her/him/them for the rest of your life?
If so, please say, "I do."

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Declaration of Intent 17

Do you, Name, take Name, in the presence of family and friends as witnesses, to be your wife/husband/spouse, your partner in life and your one true love?
 
Do you now make a lifetime commitment to be a considerate, tender, faithful, loving husband/wife/spouse, to encourage, comfort and cherish her/him/them in times of prosperity as well as in times of trouble?

And do you pledge to establish a loving home for your own family, to make her/him/them and your children the priority in your life, and to nurture your special relationship always?​

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Declaration of Intent 18

​Do you Name promise to love Name freely, without restrictions; honestly, without deceit; now, without hesitation?

Do you promise to accept her/him/them just as she/they/they is/are, sharing with her/him/them and supporting her/him/them through the experiences of your lives, be they easy or difficult, happy or sad, challenging or mundane, till death do you part?

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Declaration of Intent 19

Name, do you take Name to be the wife/husband/partner of your days, the companion of your heart and the friend of your life?  To stand united in the face of adversity and bask together in the light of good fortune? With these words spoken, and all those as yet unspoken, do you wish to marry Name and join your life with hers/his/theirs?

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Declaration of Intent 20

Do you Name promise to love Name and respect her/him/them, to share your life and your dreams, to build with her/him/them a home that is a place of love, happiness, commitment, and growth?
Do you promise to be a companion to her/him/them in all of her/his/their successes and failures, her/his/their happiness and sadness, to always give to her/him/them your unwavering support and above all else, the freedom to be herself/himself/themselves?

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Declaration of Intent 21

Name and Name, by coming here today, you have reached a crossroads in your lives. You’re turning away from your yesterdays and looking ahead to your tomorrows. Your past is a distant memory. Your future awaiting adventure. It is a new dawn, a new commitment, a new life. The bonds you are forging today will change your lives forever.

Do you, Name, promise to take Name to be your wife/husband/partner? To play with her/him/them and care for her/him/them; to make her/him/them laugh, and let her/him/them cry? To offer your best counsel and give your sincerest support with all the love you have to give?

Is it your choice that Name be the one with whom you wish to spend your life?

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Declaration of Intent 22

​We are here today, to celebrate the love, which Name and Name have for each other, and to give social recognition to their decision to commit their lives and accept each other totally.

Do you Name take Name, to be your lawfully wedded wife/husband/spouse, to share your life openly, standing with her/him/them in sickness and in health, in joy and in sorrow, in hardship and in ease, to cherish and love forever more?

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Declaration of Intent 23

Your marriage begins with the vows and promises you speak to one another today. The marriage vow is a promise of fidelity and honesty.

Name, do you love Name willingly and completely, withholding nothing? Will you protect her/him/them, and give her/him/them your deepest considerations of her/his/their feelings, desires and needs?

Will you strive to keep your love flexible and adapt to changing circumstances in the marriage? And will you be Name’s counselor, helpmate, sweetheart and lover, and best friend, from this day forward?

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Declaration of Intent 24

Will you, Name, cherish Name as your lawful wedded wife/husband/spouse, protecting her/him/them, and tending to her/his/their needs through illness and disappointment?

Will you strive to understand her/him/them, giving her/him/them comfort when she/he/they seeks it from you? Will you try never to say in anger that which you wouldn’t say in friendship? And when each night comes, will you go to sleep with thanks for her/his/their presence at your side and renewed love for her/him/them in your heart?

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Declaration of Intent 25

On this day do you affirm the love that the two of you share, looking to the future to deepen and strengthen it? Will you affirm that love in plenty and in want, in sickness and in health, in failure and in triumph. Together will you dream and break bread?  When you stumble will you restore one another? Will you share all things, serving one another and your fellow man? Will you cherish and respect, comfort and encourage one another? Be open with one another, and stay with one another as long as you both shall live, bound by your love?

Name do you choose Name to be your wife/husband/spouse, your friend, and your love?

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Declaration of Intent 26

​I know that I am here today as the officiant of your wedding.  However, that is really just to make it legal. What you are really doing today is making a public proclamation of your love.  Here, in front of these witnesses who will hopefully stand by you. And, even beyond that, you are here to make these promises to each other.  
What I’d like the two of you to do now is to take each others hands (if you haven’t already) and look into each other’s eyes - because it is nearly impossible to look into each other’s eyes and lie.  But even more so, by looking into each other’s eyes you are looking into each other’s soul’s. That is where your love for each other truly flows from. Take this time to have your souls speak in their language as I speak these words...

Name and Name,  Do you  choose to be husband and wife/Married Partners? 
Do You promise to give the best of yourselves and to ask for no more than you can give?
Do you promise to respect one another as your own person and to realize that your interests, needs and desires are no less important than the other’s? 
Do you promise to share your time and attention, and to bring joy, strength and imagination to your relationship? 
Do you promise to keep yourselves open to each other, to allow the other see through the windows of your world and into your innermost fears and feelings, secrets and dreams? 
Do you promise to grow along alongside each other, willing to face changes as you both change in order to keep your relationship alive and exciting?
Do you promise to love one another in good times and in bad, with all you have to give, and all you feel inside, in the only way you know how ... completely and forever?  
​
Name, do you take Name to be your wife/husband/spouse?

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Declaration of Intent 27

Do you Name, take Name, to be your wife/husband/spouse, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do you part?